Scans and growing pains

I’ve been away from the blogosphere for a few days while I’ve been sorting out my internetlessness and so was unable to tell you about the 12-week scan last Wednesday. I’m happy to report that Baby F passed her first real test with flying colours!! Her chances (and yes, she’s a she!) of having a fetal abnormality are much, much smaller than they were before we walked in the door.

All major organs are present and correct and basically she’s doing very well. Which has done wonders for our anxiety but of course not dispelled it totally (or even significantly). Because there’s always something more to worry about, isn’t there? I started worrying that all of the vigorous motions that the doctor was making with the scanner would harm the baby but apparently not. And the moment of sexing Baby F happened amazingly fast.

‘So do you want to know the sex of your baby?” said Dr K to L and then me about 25 minutes into the scan. She’d checked all the major and minor organs and done her measurements to determine the chances of T21 (Down’s). At the start of the scan Baby F measured 59mm, which Dr K told us was too small for a sex determination. But after L went out to empty her bladder, Baby F suddenly measured 61mm and so she could do the determination after all.

“Yes,” said L, looking at me for confirmation.
“Yes absolutely,” I said.

And within a second or so she was a she! I was amazed at how quickly the doctor could tell since I imagined that we’d all be squinting at the screen trying to work out if that little blob was actually a you-know-what. A penis. As for our reaction, well I think there’s an initial sense of shock. Because while we had no clear preferences either way and were just wanting a healthy baby, we’d started imagining that she was a he. I was coming up with silly boy names such as Buck and Pozzo to get a reaction out of L and she was calmly sticking to the name that she liked best. And then suddenly we’re ditching the boy fantasy and embracing the girl fantasy.

And I have to say that every time we see her we become more attached and are marvelling at the tiniest details. Such as that she seemed at one point to be sucking her thumb or waving to the scanner. And all those other little features which will probably only be fascinating to us. At one point she just fell asleep and it was cute to see the way that she almost seemed to fall on her face. They sleep for about 7 minutes and so she was able to wake up again with some gentle (and not so gentle) shaking of the ultrasound scanner.

I’m sure there’s some unwritten rule against revealing your baby’s sex before she’s actually born. But seeing as how we’ve broken most of the other rules, I guess there’s no real harm in breaking this one too?

But that was Wednesday and we’re now on Monday. And L is in pain. I haven’t cleared it with her that I can discuss such things as her growing pains on a public blog but it’s worrying. And as much as we say that it’s normal and of course her tummy will be sore as it expands to accommodate a growing uterus, it’s really not much fun at the moment. And so that’s where we are today. I think the reality of the tiredness and the growing pains are outweighing the excitement right now.

I hope to check in later in the week with a brief rundown of what I’ve been reading, but things here are a little crazy work-wise. Hope your week doesn’t involve cannabis-induced psychosis and some tyre-slashing.

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12 Responses to Scans and growing pains

  1. No, no psychosis here, I’m pleased to report. Tire slashing neither. Though I did read that as ‘cannibal-induced psychosis’ and thought, ‘Wow, Pete has it rough.’

    Anyway, thrilled to hear that you have a little girlie on the way and that all is well and healthy. Brilliant news, apart from the growing pains, which will pass.

  2. Pete says:

    Thanks. And yes, that would be incredibly rough! I’ve often wondered where the line of no return is and I think that’s way over it!

  3. natalian says:

    Hate to break it to you mate – but you will have to live with the worry. Once one enters the realm of parenthood that little person will never leave your thoughts! I think my hubby got down on his knees and thanked the universe when we found out our second was another boy – he knew that my pink craze would come out and his credit card may have seen red! 😉

    • Pete says:

      Natalian – Well I generally like worrying so we’ll see how I do with a lifetime of worry! And as happy as I am that Baby F is a girl, there’s also a sense of one door closing, another opening. So mixed feelings I guess.

  4. doctordi says:

    Smiling like a loon – although my grin faltered ever so slightly when I reached the closing paragraphs. But yes, there will be growing pains. I was very worried about my own cramps until I realised it was actually my body doing the right thing. But Natalian is right. I realised a little while ago that what Llew and I have REALLY signed up for is actually a lifetime of worry – I see the anxieties stretching endlessly ahead. I believe it’s known as parenthood. And somehow knowing it’s going to be like that makes it less worrying… if that makes sense.

    Anyway, it’s a girl!!! Lovely! No rules about disclosing or not disclosing as far as I know – each to their own! Sorry I am unable to reciprocate, but we decided not to find out. Excited for you, though – how very gorgeous. Your work this week? Much less so!

  5. Pete says:

    Di – I admire your restraint, I really do. As I was saying to Natalian, it was with real mixed feelings that I found out our baby’s sex.

    And as for the lifetime of worry, bring it on (I say nervously). Luckily we get to share the worry around a bit (and the joys too of course).

  6. Smithereens says:

    Oh, I guess the worrying and the cramps are part of the normal process. Hope L has it easier by now and not too much nausea. It takes some time to get used to the idea of having a little boy or a girl (and not a turtle ;)!) Thanks for sharing with us!

  7. I don’t think I’ve ever read a more delightful description of an ultrasound. I didn’t actually realize you could see them doing all that stuff in there. Nor did I realize that they sleep and wake up in their little containment pod. This is most educational! So glad that you and L and the baby are doing well.

  8. If my experience is anything to go by, the pains come and go. I was pratically doubled over all day yesterday, neraly in tears, because of the uterus stretching – in fact, I cancelled all my plans for today.

    I know what you mean re: worry – I started freaking myself out over autism the other day now that I know everything else is fine. But really, I do think the best course of action is to focus on the positive and believe in it, absolutely. I’ve surprised myself with my ability to do this over the course of the pregnancy.

    Congrats on the girl! I have no idea what I’m having and won’t know for three more weeks – so jealous of you!

  9. Pete says:

    Smithereens – Pleasure. It’s reassuring to hear that this is normal (but quite distressing at the time). L is doing fine I think.

    David – Thanks! I can’t wait for her to be out in the open and not reliant on these scans. But I think my curiousity won out over the anxiety and it was good to see her moving around a bit.

    Courtney – Sorry to hear about the pains, but I’m glad they’re not there all the time. And that’s exciting that you will hear about your baby’s sex in three weeks. I think it’s normal to worry a bit more about boy babies (since there’s a greater chance of autism) but not let the worry outweight the positive aspects. I’m still amazed at the miracle of life. All those cells dividing and growing. Pretty incredible.

  10. I’m glad to hear about baby F. I hope that things get less painful for L. It’s true about the worry but also that the more they grow the more there is to think about besides the worry.

  11. seachanges says:

    Congratulations on your little girl in the making. Life will never be the same, as you’re probably aware! Hope all goes well for both of you!

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